Daddydearest
New
Reged: 07/04/07
Posts: 3
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Do divorced dad's really get any say? I don't think so. I have gotten royally burned by the system. You can see my post in the child support forum. The court system has not gotten with the times. Both parents should be 50-50 equals in everything! I feel like I have moved on from my divorce, 8 years ago. I am re-married and just had a precious child with my wife. However, this ex still hovers over, making life as difficult as she can! She has not moved on and I pay for it emotionally, finacially, and physically! When are dad's going to get their say? Eventhough I have 50/50 custody, I get to make ZERO decisions. I am not even consulted about decision making concerning the kids. And that is B.S.! I should have a say. I should get to see my kids, when I am supossed to! I am really frustrated with the NYS court system...and how I have been bamboozled.
-------------------- Your damned if you do, your damned if you don't.
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adrenaline
Platinum
 
Reged: 03/21/06
Posts: 3892
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If you have 50/50 physical custody and you are not getting that then she is in contempt and you do have the right to fight that.
If you don't have 50/50 physical custody you are right you have not rights. They say that you have rights to education and medical, but if you fight those in court you will lose. I know first hand.
Only way you can get rights is to prove her unfit. That is next to impossible. Drugs don't even matter. Court says that if the mom is on drugs she is rehibilitable and she still wins.
The best you can do is hope for the bus to take her out. Other than that welcome to the ATM club. I am not just the president I am a member.
-------------------- The problem isn't the game; it is that nobody knows the rules.
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sahdad52
New
Reged: 06/28/08
Posts: 7
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Hi, I'm 52, live in MO. and have been married 20 years, 3 girls ages .16-13&11. I am, and have always been the main care giver,all the cooking, shoping, most of the driving, I,m the one who sits up with the sick child, She has never made it to a doc apt, I gave up my career, to support hers (she has at least for 12 years made alot more $ than me. 110k for her,16k for me, she droped some wt, changed her hair, bought all new everything, got a belly button ring, and wants to go find her soul mate. What rights do I have, don't the courts always favor the mom?
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tiredofnagging
Gold
Reged: 05/09/08
Posts: 144
Loc: Las Vegas, NV USA
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[quote]Do divorced dad's really get any say? I don't think so. I have gotten royally burned by the system. You can see my post in the child support forum. The court system has not gotten with the times. Both parents should be 50-50 equals in everything! I feel like I have moved on from my divorce, 8 years ago. I am re-married and just had a precious child with my wife. However, this ex still hovers over, making life as difficult as she can! She has not moved on and I pay for it emotionally, finacially, and physically! When are dad's going to get their say? Eventhough I have 50/50 custody, I get to make ZERO decisions. I am not even consulted about decision making concerning the kids. And that is B.S.! I should have a say. I should get to see my kids, when I am supossed to! I am really frustrated with the NYS court system...and how I have been bamboozled. [/quote]
You have the right to be nagged and driven to insanity LOL...wait a minute that's wrong....we have the right to live a normal life. In America there is freedom. Right?
-------------------- This Too Shall Pass
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jbar
Platinum
Reged: 12/16/06
Posts: 987
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As has been proven over and over again, "rights" belong only to those who are willing to FIGHT for them. Every government in history has first given the people rights on paper and then, subtly, taken them away--for its own expedient, political purposes.
Only when men who are presently NOT being victimized realize that "they could be next" and start to REALLY GET MAD about it, will there be any chance of changing hypocritical law in this respect. To do this they will have to understand that nature has provided that any thought involving a woman, in any sense, immediately disposes of their normal reasoning and defensive skills and replaces them, instead, with a warm, fuzzy feeling of love, security and a desire to protect her. This may have been entirely appropriate for the ten-thousand years of civilization PRIOR to the last 100 years, when women knew their place and the government did not get involved in a man's family, but it is FATAL, financially and emotionally, to a man today.
Only the keanest and most determined awareness, about "family" law and judicial procedures and custom can, today, keep a man out of trouble!
Edited by jbar (06/30/08 03:09 AM)
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chatter box
Platinum
 
Reged: 11/09/07
Posts: 1195
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You do have rights and you have to fight for them. It starts with your elected members including judges. People never think when they vote that the small local elections matter but that is were you live, spend your money and go to court.
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stoltz
Platinum

Reged: 01/29/07
Posts: 1478
Loc: Texas
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-------------------------------------------------------------- As has been proven over and over again, "rights" belong only to those who are willing to FIGHT for them. Every government in history has first given the people rights on paper and then, subtly, taken them away--for its own expedient, political purposes. -------------------------------------------------------------
It's all about perception, and our society has been brainwashed into believing the tired old women=good/men=evil mantra. We see it in movies, in shows, in commercials, in ads, on billboards, in the newspaper, and sadly in the court rooms. The worst part about 95% of what gets shoved into our senses each day is that it is lies and half-truths, at best.
Unfortunately, once a lie is repeated enough times, people begin to believe it. Heck, even GWB's propaganda about Iraq was enough to play on the people's patriotic feelings and he was able to get away with eroding much of our rights. Pray tell, just imagine the uphill climb fathers have in gaining equitable rights when we are all seen as deadbeat monsters without a care in the world - let alone our own kids.
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