Divorce Support Forums: How long can this go on???

[quote]It's been 11 months since she filed for divorce. I tried like hell to reconcile (to the tune of my own humiliation), and finally caved to the reality that this is the right thing.

However, here I am...tens of thousands (soon to be hundreds of thousands) of dollars later, and it's still in limbo.

My state has a 90 day minimum, 2 year maximum for divorce. In the beginning, she filed because she was so wild for adultering BF, so I really thought this would go the 90 day route. Then she filed more Complaints/Actions/Motions to keep bleeding me financially, emotionally, mentally, and physically.

I am really starting to lose my will to persevere. Technically, she could drag this out until August, 2009. Don't think I will make it that long; just too exhausted from this shit.

Anybody go through a LONG, DRAGGED OUT divorce, and if so, how the hell do you keep the stamina to keep going??? I'm so done with this, it's making me sick in every way. I feel like I am handcuffed in a fist fight.

Thank you. [/quote]

My wife left me in June '06 and the divorce became final in May of '08. Me and the X were going the route of "constructive abandonment" and the divorce should have been final in June '07. She ended up contesting the divorce and said that I kicked her out even though I begged her to seek counseling and try to work things out.

She was angry with me because after she had left me I had found someone new and was happy. She then refused to speak to me about getting the divorce over with. Her lawyer sent my lawyer a letter stating if I called her again they would get a restraining order against me.

I was trying my best to avoid court because we had very little property to dived (my house was pre-marital property)only some furniture and appliances in question.
Her lawyer would not respond to my lawyers phone calls or letters. My lawyer said to me in December '07 since they never got the out that restraining order on me that I should try calling her one more time. I did and she hung up on me when she heard my voice (what a b!tch) her lawyer then left my lawyer a message on his phone service complaining that I called her.
My lawyer then send her lawyer saying we should all sit down and work out a settlement. Her lawyer sent a letter back saying his client will not talk settlement under these circumstances. Me and my lawyer were both like...."what circumstances are they talking about" I just wanted this crap to end.

I finally had enough of the bullsh!t and my lawyer had a court date set. We went to court in early Feb '08. After the judge looked at the paper work concerning the case he said there "is not much here to be divided I would think the 2 parties could settle this without the courts help". The next court date would have been in June this year.

My X's lawyer then said to her he thinks she should talk settlement with me. My X was doing all of this me just to spite me even though she was the one to leave the relationship. After coming to an agreement that was really just her extorting money out of me we settled things and signed the divorce papers in april of this year and the judged signed off on it a month later. let me tell you I AM SO HAPPY TO BE A FREE MAN. It took almost 2 years when it should have only taken a year and it cost me thousands of more $$$$$ than it should have but I got to keep all of my house got a new great woman in my life and I AM FREE.

My EX-WIFE of the other had has been calling me lately telling me how lonely she is and how broke she is from having to pay over a grand each month in rent. I will still talk to her once in awhile if she calls me because I like to watch her sink deeper and deeper in her depression. It's gonna be real fun to hear her crying about her life if she looses her job or has to move. She is flat broke and in very deep dept.LOL

Good luck with your situation. I though mine would never end but it did finally one day and so will yours.