Divorce Support Forums: Time to throw in the towel

It's been several months since I caught my husband cheating, I've tried like hell to keep our marriage together. I give up. He has been out of work for 3 months and hasn't done a damn thing around the house - not a project, not a dish, not a load of laundry, nothing. The last few weeks he has been extra distant - and guess why? He saw me log in to this site so now I am cheating on him. He didn't bother to talk to me about it for weeks because our son was coming home from the Navy for a couple weeks before deploying to Iraq.

I'm tired of fighting, wondering and not trusting. It's time to bury the hurt deep in the ground, grieve and move on.

He finally starts working Monday - I told him I want him out of the house in 3 weeks - that will give him time for his paycheck to kick in. He has plenty of family close by if he needs a bed to sleep in but having him here is hurting me too much and in turn I feel like I've not been a good mother to my daughter etc.

I look back at our life and realize, it's always been a fight - we fought to move in together, we fought to buy our house, hell, we even were fighting when we got engaged. "Fine you want to get married then we'll ^$^ get married" that was my proposal.

I find myself fighting for his attention again - fighting for whatever it is he can't give me - even after his affair. Clearly, that makes no sense!

So anyway, thanks to everyone that has tried to move me along in my save my marriage campaign, but I will be joining the Life After Divorce folks here in short order.

The other thing is he is a big drinker - during the last few months being out of work (him) I find myself sitting with him night after night drinking myself - I hate it, the feeling in the morning, the lack of ambition......He is gone this weekend and I've accomplished so much! School shopping with my daughter, painted the hallway and the one wall of accent color I've wanted done forever (not pro painting but it's done). I just need to be me again.