mistake#2
Platinum
Reged: 07/19/06
Posts: 3257
Loc: Florida
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My ex refused over the summer to bring our 13 year old son to the doctor for a sore throat, plus balked at giving him cold medicine (didn't want to have to go out and buy more). So I've been dealing with my son having elevated levels in his urine and blood tests to find out what the problem is on top of him being treated for infection... the blood results come back yesterday. My son suffered with strep throat all summer so it has affected his kidneys since it went untreated. The doctor said the blood tests show a time line and since my son was seen in late April last - that it was beginning of summer. So now he has to have a renal ultrasound to make sure that his kidneys don't have permanent damage along with being on a stronger antibiotic for the next month. Ex is now mad about the amount of money being spent on co-pays and questioned why an ultrasound was necessary.
Over the summer my ex tried shorting me $5.60 on medical reimbursement...and over the principle I insisted that I get the full amount. Yet today I got an e-mail where he was asking about an extra .98 cents on reimbursement. Also he's insisting that I'm out for revenge, his e-mail...
(quote from ex)
I am seeing some areas where you could have saved some money on this....You were obviously not trying to save money here... 1. Amoxicillin - $4.00 at Walmart....That is a $26.00 savings...instead you took the prescription and went with the most expensive at $30.00...Why did you not go to Walmart on this or why do you not consult Walmart with prescriptions
**I tried, but the prescription was for augmentin - cause amoxicillan doesn't cure sinus or strep...and I called him ahead to let him know this too. I had gone 10 miles out of my way to go to Walmart and get the prescription filled, only to find out that it wasn't one of the $4 scripts. I could have saved myself a lot of time and trouble by just going to Walgreens.***
(quote from ex)
You know I thought we were trying to help each other eliminate as much cost for one another as possible. You must be upset at me or something because you really only go after me for stuff when you are seeking "revenge" for something I had done. I thought you were above that, but maybe I am wrong. Let me elaborate for second...revenge, like charging me a 7% sales tax on the **** or lets say even going after a prescription instead of buying the over the counter stuff - ON YOUR OWN. (In which I am not responsible for). Or even lets pretend not bothering to check around to see if you can get it cheaper, like a prescription. Paying $30 instead of $4.
**the doctor wrote a prescription for something they provide over the counter, so I asked ex if he wanted me to try the over the counter stuff which was half the cost before I filled the prescription. Not only did I not ask for the prescription, I wasn't even at the appointment. But instead of just filling the script, I asked him what he preferred for me to do.***
(quote from ex)
But hey, you say work together and yet cannot put into practice what you preach. I guess why should I expect any different.
As I told you before, I will get it to you as soon as possible...It may or may not be withing the 30 days. You may get some here or there.
**I waited almost 6 months for reimbursement last time and had to fight tooth and nail to finally get it, FOC states he has 30 days. So I asked him to send it within 30 days...but I also called him 4 weeks ago to let him know that it was coming, so in essense I gave him 60 days.**
Am I truly not working with him here? I tried to get the prescription cheaper, but couldn't. I called him weeks ago to give him a heads up on expenses that were coming. I called him before filling a prescription and we agreed to try the over the counter stuff - but I guess he expected that I should cover it since our agreement is he covers co-pays yet I was specific in telling him that I expected him to cover it if we did over the counter and if we went through FOC, they would make him pay for ALL over the counter although I generally cover it all.
If he had brought our son to the doctor over the summer, then we would have saved more than half of these visits and co-pays...
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jersey girl
Platinum
Reged: 08/07/06
Posts: 1629
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Save the emails.
Do the right thing for your son. Ignore any emails from him on costs, etc. unless they outline a payment plan.
And if he has permanent kidney damage, get your butt to court and get supervised visitation for him within the state to stop this from ever happening again.
This is not him not going to the doctor. This is child abuse.
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taryn
Platinum
Reged: 05/31/07
Posts: 2460
Loc: standing on the mountaintop! :...
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oh wow!
this is truely bad news!
your poor son!
i hope his dad feels like a complete a$$.
...not that it will help your son of course.
and i hope his condition is able to be fixed asap.
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taryn.
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gigi
Platinum
Reged: 11/06/06
Posts: 5141
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I've noticed that in some situations the shortest possible explanation is the best. You already know this is the hardest thing for ME to do, but in some areas in business, I must.
My response to him would be:
"you didn't take him to a doctor when he needed. Now the doctor says because of your negligence, he may have kidney damage. The necessary medication is NOT amoxicillin and is NOT on the $4 prescription list at WalMart, but I did take the time and extra gas money to drive over there and do comparison shopping before figuring it out.
Your nasty and aggressive position that we should cheapen up on taking care of our child is what got him into this position in the first place. No amount of nasty accusations from you will change the fact that the current situation can be directly traced to your refusal to take care of our son this summer when he was with you. I'm pretty sure God would not approve of your nasty accusations against the mother of your child, and I suggest you pray that the kidney damage caused by your negligence is not irreversable."
OK, probably that last two sentences was overkill, but given his history... and it's not quite as short as I'd like, but it does get the point across, doesn't it?
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taryn
Platinum
Reged: 05/31/07
Posts: 2460
Loc: standing on the mountaintop! :...
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one more thing...
you son's father is SUCH a cheap [censored]!
this takes the cake!
uh!
ps. how's your new the little baby doing?
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taryn.
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mistake#2
Platinum
Reged: 07/19/06
Posts: 3257
Loc: Florida
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Well it turned really nasty, and I admit that I didn't help the situation with a few jabs...but what he ended up stating was way out of line and his wife is now trying to do damage control.
some examples of the back n' forth....
(quote from ex)
You know I have an email for you but I am at work I do not have the luxury like you to sit a computer and type an email when ever the heck I want. So just stay patient and I will give you a response...Probably one that you will not like but again what else it new..
***my response back was..."your right, my husband allows me the luxury of not having to work while taking care of a newborn and toddler (along with my 3 other children)...what a change from when N was a newborn and I had to take up a second job waitressing.
My husband says to just subtract off the 13.99 for the over the counter and we will fill the presciption as the doctor suggested, since the over the counter didn't work completely anyhow. I will send you a copy of the receipt for the co-pay."
He refused to work (quit job after job) and since I was supporting us I went back to work a week after our son was born and then got a 2nd job waitressing to pay our bills.
(Ex's response)
Ouch...well at least I never cheated after six months. (an ex-boyfriend kissed me so in essence he's correct but he was sleeping with his best friends wife 8 months into our marriage so I guess that makes him a better person.)
But again, we can go on and bring up the past as you always seem to do...Grow up and get over it. You have been married two more times beyond our marriage....So why are you still holding on to this...It is over Holly....I am beyond that...Why aren't you?
In regards to filling the prescription, then treat it again...are you not allowed to treat it more than once? Is there a treat limit on there?
***my response..."The doctor stated that she prescribed a stronger strength as over the counter might not work...since it didn't work the first time anyhow we think its in Nate's best interest to follow the doctor's advice instead of your financial restrictions. Sorry we tried to save $$ & asked for you to pay for the over the counter...won't happen again.
I wasn't f****** my best friends wife...and I know who my children's fathers are too.
(ex's response)
This is between you me....and I did not f****the entire Parkway tropics strippers either...and then get caught by the pastor. So I guess you cannot let go...I guess you need counseling for that. Maybe you should schedule another appointment...Psycho!!!
***He's delusional and making stuff up which doesn't surprise me, (he's adding false details to an incident where I went with friends to a strip club and he sent our pastor there to talk to me...okay not becoming of a married woman but not what he's stating and obviously there was no secret about where I was). I don't get what made me psycho?
In between some of these, we had e-mails too about our sons medical...he states that my doctor is a liar and there is no way my son had strep throat all summer, that he probably has had it only the time he's been home which I took him to the dr within 2 weeks of being home and there was already levels in his urine which take months to get, (trying to state things off web md) and that amoxicillan DOES take care of strep.
My final response was basically that he was welcome to call our son's doctor so she could explain it to him as he's not a doctor.
Now his wife is e-mailing me and stating all sorts of strange things...somehow she felt it necessary to tell me that she was raped and how her oldest child was from this...how she probably has cancer, and how she's going to have a hysterectomy, and that she left the state when she got pregnant from my husband to not complicate things and that the baby was 4 months early...she tells so many lies about things that aren't even necessary. Babies born 4 months early don't weight almost 6 pounds, the son that was supposedly produced by a rape is mirror image of her husband, she told our son that God healed her cancer and if he prays hard enough that God will heal his kidneys too (so the ultrasound is unnecessary)...it's all just crazy and so unnecessary.
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mistake#2
Platinum
Reged: 07/19/06
Posts: 3257
Loc: Florida
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[quote]ps. how's your new the little baby doing? [/quote]
Baby is doing great. Healthy and gaining weight already.
I got 4 phone calls from the pediatricians office today...my 9 year old son that has reoccurring health issues had blood tests done and is allergic to a bunch of stuff. Not too big of a deal, but the funny part is that last week the doc told me to start giving him extra milk and meat as he may have some type of zinc deficiency but then she calls today and says that he's mildly allergic to milk and should drink soy.
The bad phone call came a little later as she got my other sons - the 13 year olds - blood results back after having them retested...she asked that we bring him in for more blood work cause some of the results are showing that he may have either Lupus or some type of genetic kidney disease but they didn't have enough blood to retest. He had his renal ultrasound done today and they will have the results back for us on Wednesday.
There is something the doctor isn't telling us though, cause when listing the tests off to the technician she got to one and refused to say it in front of us...told her that she'd tell her in the hall. Don't know what that meant other than there is something that the doc doesn't want to scare us with.
So unfortunately there is permanent damage - we just don't know yet the extent. He's not having any major issues though so I have to think it's minor, and precautionary to just know exactly what we are dealing with so that in the future he doesn't take certain meds that could further the damage but I'm just guessing on that.
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twins1
Platinum
Reged: 06/26/08
Posts: 312
Loc: PA
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Good Grief!!!! I am so sorry for your troubles at this most happy time!! wow. You and your family are in my prayers.
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twinsmom
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