monger
Gold
Reged: 09/30/08
Posts: 134
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I keep thinking I should go back..why? Because I'm scared.
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gigi
Platinum
Reged: 11/06/06
Posts: 5141
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Where are you that going back is a possibility? How far into the process are you, and who among your family and friends have rallied around you to do things like take you out for Friday happy hours & such? If you're just a week into it... it's FRESH and you need to give this time... if you're a YEAR into the separation and feelign like this... it's very different.
Tell us waht stage you're at.
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monger
Gold
Reged: 09/30/08
Posts: 134
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It's been a year.
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monger
Gold
Reged: 09/30/08
Posts: 134
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But my logical side still says that going back would be wrong. An exaggerated version of what I've been all along - staying out of fear.
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monger
Gold
Reged: 09/30/08
Posts: 134
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I'm fairly alone in all this. I have my counselor and my parents - kind of. They no longer no what to say. I can only give myself the answers I need. I have been on a few dates, and it has confirmed that I can have a deeper connection. Even in those brief encounters, I've had the kind of conversations I could never have with my ex.
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monger
Gold
Reged: 09/30/08
Posts: 134
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Joining a support group. Really hard to find one for men. I guess I wasn't surprised, but I was a bit disappointed. It hits us hard to. Very hard.
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clofromco
Silver
Reged: 08/19/08
Posts: 93
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I married my hubby when he had not been out on his own. After 15 years he as figure out he missed a part of his life. Being out on his own. It happens to men and women. Perhaps this is what your wife is going through. I don't know if she will decide you are the one, but you must move in a forward direction, for yourself.
Keep posting and there will be support here for you.
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monger
Gold
Reged: 09/30/08
Posts: 134
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I was the one who left - she seemed content in a loveless marriage filled with screaming, no intimacy and no common ground. I decided I needed more. A real connection. Not one that survived purely out of a fear of change.
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