My husband told me back in April that he wanted to leave me. We weren't fighting. I had postpartum depression at the time. I quickly went to a doctor to get help. One week later he saw an attorney. He said he had feelings for someone else and it was too late for me. He insisted that he didn't cheat but wanted to and wanted out. He was very apathetic with me. He had secret phone calls with this girl. But - then all of a sudden he dropped the legal pursuit and never served me. he went to counseling with me. He has been home ever since. We slept in the same bed, went on dates, we hang out all the time. BUT every day he tells me he wants to move out (even tho he is doing all these things). Finally, I told him to take 30 days to think it over. Make sure this is what he wants. All of a sudden he is calling me all the time & emailing. I can't figure this out. I know he still talks to the girl that he was interested in. I just don't know. He had his attorney send me a letter saying that he is to move back into the home until I fill out a financial declaration. I don't want a divorce (of course I hate being treated like Crap, too). I don't understand why he needs to move back in because he doesn't want custody of our child. This makes no sense to me. We also have many rental properties which don't have any equity, yet - he wants to take all of them with him but he doesnt' work and hasn't made any money in 4 months. ???? Can he do that? I say liquidate - IF he actually goes through with this. Then he says he will not serve me - until we both agree to do the financial declaration we will stay stagnent. Does any of this make sense???? HELP
My husband did the same thing. Last year he told me I was causing all the horrid problems in his life and he wanted me out. Then months after coming back home begging me to forget it ever happened, he tells me there was another woman but he never had any physical relationship with her.
If he isn't even willing to work this out, not putting forth any effort, and reminding you everyday how much he'd like to leave - let him. I walked on eggshells for over a year trying to make mine as happy as possible. It was no kind of life to live, but I was committed to my marriage and my vows. But, since he started the same old song and dance of me and our marriage being the source of his unhappiness I said no more.
You really need to speak with any attorney. You'll need to be living apart for a year in order to divorce, and you and the child certainly don't want to be the ones having to leave. We drew up a separation agreement. He kept the house (which was partly his father's anyway, long story) and I'm keeping the car. Other than that, I have no idea what I'm doing! But, I can't be blamed anymore for making him miserable and I can start to build my own happier life. I hope you'll be able to do the same. Good luck!
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