Amy Ray
New
Reged: 01/17/07
Posts: 1
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I have been trying to get a divorce for three years. My husband has managed to keep the divorce from being finalized. He was served with papers,he hired an attorney and just in the nick of time, he contested the settlement agreement and we agreed to his terms. He signed the papers and just before he was due to be deployed,he told his lawyer to place them on hold. He always seems to manage to avoid finalizing the divorce. He is collecting extra income from the military for me as adependant. He hsa also received BHA,which I haven't seen a dime of in three years! He doesn't have to pay childsupport according to florida statues because we are not leagally divorced. I get 600.00 a month for our three children. According to th e florida stutes he should be paying over 900.00 a month. I don't know what else to do! The military has placed everything on hold because he is deployed. There has to someone who can help me? How can he get away collecting that extra income and BHA for three years and me not get a dime. Does military even care that he is screwing them too!
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aon75
Platinum

Reged: 08/22/06
Posts: 3266
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Why not just bring him to court then and have the judge force the divorce? Are you still living together through all this time that you have been trying to get a divorce?
-------------------- Life is like a dream. It can be whatever we make of it.
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is it over
Platinum

Reged: 11/19/06
Posts: 331
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Military is tricky. The BAH is for housing, so is he paying for housing with it? Does he live in quarters? Is he a career soldier? Does he care what his commander says? I would say call the unit and tell them he is deployed and your family is having financial problems and you need some more money or else a notarized form to allow the divorce to go through. See what they say. Tell them you need to go to ACS or whatever and ask for a hardship loan, it will be under his SSN because he is the sponsor. I would def tell him before I started causing trouble. Tell him your sick of it and he needs to take care of business...
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davej
Platinum

Reged: 03/01/06
Posts: 665
Loc: VA
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Have you sought legal advise on your own?
-------------------- DaveJ
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kvcmedic
New
Reged: 01/03/07
Posts: 7
Loc: USA
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As a military dependent you should be able to talk to JAG also. There is also a possibility of Court Order BAH if you have the children. He has an obligation to take care of his dependents. The millitary is pretty strict about that...Talk to JAG for advice.
-------------------- Marriage is Grand; Divorce is $20 Grand
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BEANS1269
New
   
Reged: 10/02/06
Posts: 10
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It's illegal for him to be getting "with dependant" rate BAH and have no dependants living with him. Call the Finance/Military Pay office and report him, ASAP
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snickers1818
New
Reged: 01/25/07
Posts: 15
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First of all, did he put in an official "Request for a Stay of Proceedings" to the court? If not, he is not protected by the SCRA in this case.The rights provided a servicemember under the SCRA are not automatic!! He does have to provide you with at least the BAH w/dep rate as long as he is deployed. He DOES NOT have to send you anything else though. My husband got BAH w/dep even after he PCS'ed from Ft. Knox to Ft. Hood (where we live now) and he did not have his two other kids living with him at the time. Don't know how or why but it happened!! I do not get why the court will not grant you a temporary order for support? That is all you would need and have it sent to DFAS (sort of as an involuntary allotment)UNLESS he did put in the request for the stay. My husband went to Iraq and he and his EX had not had anything done regarding their child support prior to him leaving. She got a temp order for support, they sent it to DFAS but his Rear-D had already put in the request for stay on his behalf prior so she did not get anything until he came back from Iraq, almost a year later. I offered to set up an allotment to her for the amount that the state said she should get but she refused it so she got nothing from him. He was forgiven the arrears too because he was deployed and had no way of being here to go to court. Good luck!
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Barbie27_71
New
Reged: 02/01/07
Posts: 5
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TEMP FIX: If you need immediate financial assistance there are resources to help especially when he is deployed. You are still married and I used this resource. You tell them your situation you're married but separated have 3 kids he is deployed and not paying you jack nothin. They will help you. They paid my electric bill, gas bill and sent me a wal mart gift card. USA Cares.... homefront cares... and there are more out there. You could google search for a list of non profit org's who assist military families with financial hardships. Best of luck
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milwife
New
Reged: 01/16/06
Posts: 1
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Hello, I had sort of the same problems you can contact red cross in your city they have a program for help and you should also contact his Captain or the Inspector Generals office for his unit they will get to the bottom of it. Good Luck
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usmcbombtech
New
Reged: 11/28/07
Posts: 2
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First of all it is not illeagle to draw BAH if the dependant isn't living with him. If he has a dependant(wife) he rates BAH with dependants even if she isn't living with him. Now if he resides out in town and this is allowed by his C.O. then he is required to pay the difference between BAH own right and BAH with dependants to the dependant. If he is drawing BAH with dependants and lives in the barracks then he is required to pay the full amount to the dependant. You all need to stop trying to be "Sea Lawyers" and find out what you are talking about before telling someone what is illeagle or not. Go to legal and find out for yourself before taking these know it all dependants advice.
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