Divorce Support Forums: HELP NEED SOME OPINIONS ANSWER GUY?

[quote]OK, "equity" means how much of the house's value do you own, which is a different than the total value of the house if you bought it with a mortgage... it usually means something like this: I put 20% down on a $100,000 house so I had $20,000 equity in it. Then after a year I had paid down the $80,000 mortgage by $1,000 worth, so the mortgage was only a $79,000 debt at that time. If the house was still worth $100,000, then I had $21,000 worth of equity, but if the house was worth $150,000, then I have a $79,000 loan on it, 29 years left to pay on the loan, and $71,000 worth of equity. And THEN you've got an argument to make... let's say you bought the house with your Dad's 20K and then paid the mortgage with joint earnings, there is a REAL question of whether or not the JOINT portion of the house is equal to $1,000 (the amount paid by the marriage), or whether it's equal to $51,000 (the amount of the increase in the value of the equity over the past year), or whether it's equal to something closer to $3,500 (you put in 20K, the marriage put in $1K so the marriage's portion of the property could be called one in 21... use that proportion to figure out how much of the CURRENT equity, or $71,000, is the marriage's proportion...)

You see, it can become a very complicated calculation if people think they're buying a house with thier inheritance & what thery're REALLY doing is buying a down payment and then paying it off with marital property... BUT you don't have that situation. Youv'e got a MUCH simpler situation...

Because you put 100% down on the house, it's 100% sole & separate equity, so there's really nothing she desrves. Have her take the barbecue or whatever back. Or pay her for it, if she insists, but she does not get to get part of the house your Dad bought for you just because she managed to stay married to you for a few years after you got the house!

The fact that you have a house and therefore are able to make ends meet in your current job means you probably won't get alimony even if you asked for it, and she certainly doesn't deserve any. The fact that you lost your job due to something not any fault of your own means that she can't complain that there's less money coming in.

After hearing what you just said, I'm feeling even more secure about telling you that what she's asking for, she won't get...

But like I said, there are never any promises.

Still, it sounds like her demands, IF she dares to push tehm, are being made in bad faith... short term marriage, she makes more than you, and she wants spousal support? BAD FAITH... and she somehow wants you to give her part of the house that your Dad gave you in it's entirety and she had the benefit of living in SCOTT FREE for the past several years? BAAAAAAD faith!

Ask your attorney to put this stuff in a motion for summary judgment on the issues of the home equity and alimony and consider asking for attorney's fees for having had to even answer her demands for this stuff. If she realizes that her claims are so off base that she might have to pay for your lawyer to defend your property against those stupid claims, she might smarten up & stop the battle on these points.

Divorce doesn't have to be like this, so nasty. I don't know why people make it like that. It's not like you two have so much money or assets that either of you could expect to live high on hte hog, and her belief that she deserves something from your Dad's estate is just greedy. Greed is what causes most of the animosity and in situatinos where there's just not that much to get greedy about, it's just nasty for the sake of being nasty. [/quote]

Thank you so much for your advice it really means a lot to me going through this CRAP. I'll let you know how things turn out. I'm going to see my lawyer later this week to fill out some forms about my net worth and show them what my bills are every month.

One of the reasons she is so bitter is a few months after she left me I started dating someone new and it pissed her off. I guess she wanted me to sit around and be miserable but I went on with my life. She had a few bitter divorced friends that did not know the situation and told her to take me for all I am worth when they didn't know how I acquired the house. They figured we had a mortgage and she was on the deed. She bought into what they were telling her and she decided not to try and work things out with me.

I told her while we were still together that these "friends" would give 2 sh!ts about your marriage if things were going great. I told her if you said your marriage was going great the conversation would have lasted about 2min but say things are sh!tty then they are all ears and even calling you back the next day to see if things still suck. They would never be calling her back the next day to see if things were still going great. Of course from what I have heard these 2 or 3 friends don't even talk much to her now. The story is old now and they don't care.

Again thanks for your reply.

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