Divorce Support Forums: Help me get out! And how?

Your first goal is to secure a full-time job. If you're going this direction then go there full tilt.

Next - seperate your finances fully and completely making sure you have all of your assets in your own accounts and are spending your money - not his.

Now - as for debts - it's community property if it's acquired during the marriage. Even if it doesnt' have his name on it - it was still acquired in the fulfillment of the needs of the family. I suspect you can assign a significant percentage of that debt to him and should do so.

Custody - I would suggest that you and dad do what's best for the kids and make sure they have equal access to both parents. Based upon the income information you've provided even on a 50/50 custody with you as primary residence you'll get a sizable child support payment. You'll want to run through those numbers with an attorney.

As for the house - ask that it be sold as part of the division of assets. if there's any equity in it you should get a percentage of that in the sale which I would apply to the debts.

I don't know where you live in Indiana there are lots of nice housing options that may not be 'Carmel-like' but are still very nice.

I see a lot of talk in your e-mail about handouts and government support. I think you have a dismal outlook on your financial prospects but you need to educated on the divorce system and realize it's not going to leave you high and dry where the debts are concerned. Yes, you'll have a reduction in quality of life but so will he.

Oh yeah - you can also probably have (as much as it pains me to say it - i'm a dad *grin*) part of your attorney fees assigned to him.

The goal of the divorce courts is to distribute wealth and debts as much as posssible so that the kids are not victimized by the divorce any more than they will be. That is facilitated by custody arrangements and the financial distribution.

I would encourage you to think of the kids not matter how much you and hubby are at odds. Protect your relationship with them and remember that dad wants to do the same. If you guys can find a way to keep that in balance... well... good luck.

Post Extras