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State Support Forums >> Pennsylvania
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lilywantsout
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Reged: 07/27/06
Posts: 61
Loc: PA
will this ever end?
      07/28/06 11:34 AM (199.79.10.117)
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Any help/advise/moral support etc that anyone out there can offer would be appreciated. I was married for 27+years when I filed for divorce 5/2004. My SBTX is fighting it/trying to drag it out as long as possible. Of course – who would want to get rid of the goose that layed the golden egg? I’m paying him spousal support now & between that & the health insurance he just wants this to go on&on….but I want to move on w/my life! (I was 18 when we married & thought I knew what I was doing. I’d thought about leaving MANY times over the years but didn’t for many reasons – money being a big one. I (the wife) have been the sole wage earner for our entire marriage (except when he worked a few weeks in the late 70’s – then quit when he couldn’t get along w/his boss!). In addition to being the sole income provider, I did the VAST majority of the housework, cooking, cleaning, laundry, lawn mowing, grocery shopping, bill paying – you name it! (He claims to have taken care of household & car maintenance but if you saw the house & the car you’d wonder what he’s done w/his time all of these years!) Thankfully we never had any kids (for many reasons, including that he said he couldn’t stay home w/them that I’d have either stay home or arrange for child care!) – it has seemed over the years more like I MARRIED a child!
Anyways, today his atty (he finally hired one & has filed for alimony, equitable distribution, & for me to pay his atty fees!) was to file a motion to force marriage counseling! I have yet to hear from my atty to see if that was successful or not (he’s to try to quash it but I have no idea what’ll happen). I was hoping to retire in June ’07 but I’m beginning to wonder if this divorce will be final by then! (my atty tells me it takes 3MONTHS from the date you request the meeting w/the Master for the equitable distribution hearing, I’m still waiting for a response from his atty regarding the last property settlement offer. I’m willing to let him have the house (which is paid for) & his ira’s (which I funded & are larger than my own) & a lot of other stuff (including another property – vacant lot) but really want to protect my pension/ira/deferred compensation (state employee – like a 401k) $. Does anyone out there have any idea how long this will take in PA, or have any idea in a pretty unusual circumstance like mine how the courts would decide to split up our assets &/or if they would actually order me to pay alimony after the divorce? He claims to be disabled but he hasn’t been to any doctor since I left! AND HE HAS INSURANCE! It’s hard to maintain a positive attitude when someone like him can sit on his a** for years then expect to be taken care of for the rest of his life without lifting a finger! Sorry this is so long.

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Subject Posted by Posted on
* will this ever end? lilywantsout 07/28/06 11:34 AM
. * * Re: will this ever end? lilywantsout   08/04/06 11:41 AM
. * * Re: will this ever end? lilywantsout   08/17/06 05:41 PM
. * * Re: will this ever end? dmc   08/20/06 08:21 PM
. * * Re: will this ever end? lilywantsout   08/23/06 06:21 PM
. * * Re: will this ever end? dmc   08/25/06 11:07 AM
. * * Re: will this ever end? lilywantsout   08/25/06 07:41 PM
. * * Re: will this ever end? ann3232   09/14/06 11:47 AM
. * * Re: will this ever end? lilywantsout   07/28/06 01:09 PM

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