hi everyone, hope you can bear with this novel i am about to write. i am new to this so please excuse me if this in the wrong place.i am a mom to 2 wonderful little boys aged 8 and 4 and plan on filing for divorce within the year. let me tell you my story. i married in 99 and after some time saw the true colors of the man i married. my oldest son was born in 2000 and my husband has done absolutely nothing for him. he also crossed the line so much with discipline during his formative years that i believe he did irreperable damage. when i mean crossing the line i mean he pulled his hair, smacked his hands so hard they were red, and left marks when he spanked him.my oldest was also diagnosed as autistic at age 4. on top of that he has never done anything with him-he doesn't even talk to him. when i saw how horrible he was, i knew i had to be a stay at home mom, because i absolutely feared for my child and myself (although he has never hit me, he is verbally abusive)
i was going to leave in 03 after i graduated college but had the bad luck of being on the pill and conceiving anyway. after how he was with my first born i was horrified about bringing another child in to this situation. well, the husband did it again! he does nothing for my youngest either. i threatened to send his butt to jail and he finally stopped with his supposed "discipline".now he just neglects them.
the thing is that even though he works he should treasure the time with his kids. he has only taken them to 2 functions their entire life. he doesn't talk to them and ignores them when they try to talk to him.he doesn't play or interact with them in any way that a father should. it's sad too. he told me he doesn't know how to be a dad and doesn't have the instincts to be one.he is not physically or emotionally supportive at all to my boys.his family treats my boys like trash as well.he is more loyal to his family, than he has ever has been to us.
i feel so overwhelmed and have been trapped by this man and this sham for so long, but i always tried to carry on and be civil even though i felt far from that . he has threatened to kill himself if i left him and even talked about that before when we had some simple financial problems!
i finally decided after a visit home to texas last weekend that i had to start really saving more money and prepare to move on. i have plenty of savings set aside because he said i would get nothing if i leave. that isn't happening!
i would really like to raise my kids in a beautiful setting like texas is. i have 2 college degrees and own a cemetery restoration business that i could operate all year long if i was there. as you know, we can't do any outside work here now in michigan.
my family can't believe how horrible he is and tell me to get as far away as possible and come home. i know his family would harass me to the Nth degree if i stayed here too.
what would be the chance of me getting soul custody of my boys? would i be able to move back home to texas? i have everything i said above documented. i would want them to talk to him, but even at a young age they really have no desire to do so.
help! i believe i am doing the right thing and finally getting out of this situation. what do you think?
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