I in the same boat as you, divorcing because my STBX had an affair (and still going on). I filed no-fault, however my lawyer said that it will all be brought up in court and will have a bearing as far as custody and settlement, so it really isn't necessary to file At-Fault. I guess I am a little confused as far as where you are in the divorce. I assume you went to domestics for the custody and support, but have you settled yet? Feel free to Private message me if you want to discuss any further.
You might want to post on the main boards, all you have to do is sign up. There are alot of people that can give you good advice and support.
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