Divorce Support Forums: excuses

I'm no lawyer so don't take my advice without verifying, but IMO you should file an intent to use summaries and a list of evidence that just states "receipts of blah blah". This stuff needs to get filed according to state defined deadlines prior to your hearing. You need three copies, yours, one for the court, and one for her. (Often copy machines run low on toner making that third copy). Get yours and the courts copy of all your evidentiary receipts etc. in a nice three ring binder with seperators and checks taped to pages and each page titled to explain what each check shows. Hers just dump in a certified mail box for her to sort and figure out what you're going to show with what or she'll spin lies for everything in advance. At the hearing you present the summary that shows on one sheet of paper exactly what you are alleging. A spreadsheet or chart is perfect, a timeline or calendar to match and you've made your point. When questioned on any detail refer to the proof in the binder.

The judge won't look through a ton of papers to match things up and her word against his...her wins. Paper proof of payments are impossible to ignore, and if organized and presented in this manner readily accepted as truth. After Gigi told me that the only way to fight the convincing lies of a narcissist was with hard irrefutable proof, I learned how to present it from a successful lawyer. Unfortunately this only worked in money matters where there was paper proof. She didn't get away with her motions for contempt that "she hasn't seen a dime" from me, and I should pay her lawyers fees and retro temporary support.

If you can do this work and have a lawyer present it you will save a lot of money and have a much better chance at truth coming out. The only bigger disadvantage a man has in court is being a man without a lawyer. No respect commanded, no fear of followup or appeal. Good Luck.

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