Divorce Support Forums: Need Support

So, last night my husband told me that his "mind isn't with me" (whatever that means) and that he's thinking we should divorce. He wouldn't say if he was sure about it, but he's supposed to think about it and we're supposed to talk on Monday. He also said that there is some other woman that he's apparently "fallen in love with," but she's not interested in him (oddly, I wasn't really very jealous). Now, I feel like I'm literally going insane. I guess that his suggestion that we should break up wasn't really a surprise, and frankly I've thought about it myself sometimes -- but those thoughts have always passed whenever I got over being mad at him at whatever it was that he had done. Now, I'm finding this situation very distressing. Whenever I see him or if he talks to me, I just start crying. It's ridiculous. Last night, after we talked, we slept in the same bed. I was an absolute crying mess, and he just laid there. I just wanted someone to console me and give me a hug, I guess. So, rather pathetically I might add, I asked my husband if he'd give me a hug. And he did, and held me for awhile. Then, as he was holding me, I thought, "He probably doesn't even want to be doing this." So, I said to him, "You probably don't even want to hold me." He kept holding me, and held me tighter. Then, I thought, "Is he taking pity on me?" and almost pulled away. But then I figured that if I pulled away, I'd probably want him to hold me again. So, I stayed there. I cried pretty much all night until I finally fell asleep, and was crying this morning when I got ready for work and for a few hours at work. Then, I was finally able to focus and put my home life out of my mind. Now that I'm home again for the evening, everything he does makes me cry. He made dinnner and asked me if I wanted any -- that made me start to *sob*. I don't know what the heck my problem is.

I think that something that is making this especially hard is the fact that I really have no support system. I have no family -- my husband's parents and siblings are my only family. And my husband and I spend all of our free time together, so my only real "friends" are at work, I don't want to talk about this with them. I guess I just need someone to tell me to keep my chin up and that things will be okay. But I don't know if they will be. The idea of being alone and not being with my husband, and not growing old with my husband like I thought I would is making me very sad.

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