Divorce Support Forums: Quitting job vs. getting laid-off

He may very well BE a louse. Your way of explaining it though is not persuasive. Saying he's not running up the credit cards because his creditors keep calling you to try to collect ... well, it's not a logical conclusion. The logical conclusion from hearing that someone's creditors are chasing his ex is that he IS living off credit, NOT earning a whole bunch of new money that he's spending, and therefore his debt issue IS a problem for him (and the fact that he's making it your issue is what makes him a louse).

The fact that you mentioned the nice dinners and nice life he's had for himself shows that you DO care about his lifestyle, despite your protests to the contrary.

Having drained his own kids' bank accounts is horrible, but does not in any way prove that he's not in desparate straits of his own making. It kind of proves the opposite point of what you were trying to say to begin with, which was that he's in this situation voluntarily, that he is living high off the hog and starving your kids out intentionally just for the purpose of avoiding support, that he is working at a cheaper job on purpose. Your thread was to figure out whether he voluntarily quit or whether he was truly laid off as he seems to be claiming. All your evidence points to being involuntarily laid off.

This doesn't mean he's not a louse and you're not having a hard time, just that your initial premise was NOT the logical necessary conclusion that you were suggesting.

He works at a restaurant and uses pot & cocaine? did he really even have a great steady job to quit, or has he alwasy been a job hopper. If he's always had a hard time keeping a job and is a druggie to boot, then say so. It doesn't look near as bad to you if you say that stuff than if you say he's a high earner with a steady job who voluntarily quits and takes a lower paying job because he doesn't want ot pay support. ... the idea that a steady high earner would voluntarily trash their own career and finances out of spite is not logical. however, if he was never such a steady person, if he's always got a scam around every corner, is always trying to duck out of work, is losing jobs on a regular basis, buys an duses drugs on the job... well... say so.

if that's the pictrue of who he is, then he's clearly NOT intentionally losing jobs as you initially claimed... what's happening is that he's a real jerk and drug addict who is not a very good father and would rather drain his kid's accounts than come down off his high and work a real job. And if he's like this with you he's probably like this with employers and so involuntarily losing jobs is more credible than intentionally leaving jobs.

I don't know what stage of the divorce process you're in, but if you're on your way to court for any part of it, you'll find that you'll be more successful if you don't accuse him of being evil and an intentionally bad father who COULD do better without treatment, but rather accuse him of being... sick, lazy, addicted. You have EVIDENCE
of him being an addict (3 duis) and so THAT is a CREDIBLE complaint that can be backed up with facts.

The facts you're presenting with the intent to prove that he's quitting jobs just to mess with you and just to avoid support... it simply does not prove what you're claiming it does.

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