Divorce Support Forums: Breaking the cycle...

Oh my gosh it's possible, you can be impressed by a woman!

My take (again feel free to tell me to mind my own business) you're putting unrealistic expectations on yourself and that is what's hindering your progression and the speed at which your heading down the path to a new life......

and actually the women that you've been dating, too.

As I told you, the most stunning, beautiful, intelligent, witty woman will not erase the feelings you have for your ex-wife. IMO that's an unfair, unrealistic expectation you've been placing on these unsuspecting women.

You were in love, shared a life, had children and considered your ex-wife to be your best friend. It takes time to disengage the emotional connection of such a bond and re frame the dynamics for a future relationship. Physically you're disengaged... you live apart form her, you're actively dating and you're broadening yourself with new hobbies. Although with the uncertainty and confusion you've been feeling, I would suggest moving away from the close friendship to more of a business like
connection. Allow the many layers of emotional disentanglement to catch up to the physical aspect. (no pun intended)

Letting go, being healed or moving on ( however you want to label it) is not necessarily the absence of feelings, whether they're feelings of fondness or pain She will always be the mother of your children, accept that you will not completely remove all traces of her existence from who you are and then (IMO) you'll be free!

I'm happy for the giddy feelings! Now who is she so I can check her out on your myspace page?

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life may not be the party we hoped for, but while we're here we should dance..

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