Divorce Support Forums: dumb question

I am new here so please forgive me if I say or ask something that has been addressed before.
My husband and I have been together for 10 years and we have children together. He has been divorced for 12 years from his first wife. Their son is 14 years old. She is also remarried to a gentleman 21 years her senior and very well off.
It was an amicable divorce but she tries to dictate the relationship between father and son (a very long story). Anyhow, she emails me instead of my husband with request (usually for money or to "gather" information. I am one of those step-parents that takes the step back. I honor and respect the fact that she is his mother and my husband is the father. However, I am tired of the emails. I have asked her to email or call my husband. DH has done the same. I do not want to be in the middle of anything. She recently sent me an email concerning my husband paying their son's vacation expenses ($2500). I mean this isn't a vacation he is going on with my husband but rather with his mother and step-father. When I send my usual reply of, please take this up with (husband's name), she gets down right vicious. Am I in the wrong in not responding more to her emails? My husband says the same thing I will respond (and he does) but then she starts the threats against me, our children, going to court etc.

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