Can't believe it. My first post and worked hard on it but it disappeared when I clicked continue.
Oh well - will try again and make it shorter this time.
Married over 10 years with kids. I tried to make it work. Tried hard but my wife didn't seem to care. Guess it was too little too late. Much of the fault lies with me. I was sooo immature when we married and had very low self esteem. I married her to fill a need. A need no one could fix but me. She was the powerful one in our relationship and over time I began to resent that. I felt controlled and, well, like a little kid being told what to do by mom.
This was all below my conscious level and I denied my feelings. I didn't know how to stand up for my wants and needs and communicate. Instead I just withdrew and tried to hide. The only place I could feel powerful was at work.
We have been in therapy for 2 years. I have also been for a year on my own. I have made great strides on my own. Done everything my wife has asked for. But she has been rejecting my work and saying its not enough. I really tried hard sharing some things that were very difficult to say. She didn't care.
I feel so depressed, lonely, worthless, unhappy and anxious. But I also feel relief and happy that I am no longer stuck in limbo. Every time I tried she said it is not good enough. How do you live with these feelings? Do they go away? When? Is it normal to have so many different feelings at the same time?