Thanks for the thoughtful response. It is comforting to have my feelings validated. Having never been through this experience I have no baseline to compare.
The limbo comment was indeed in reference to a divorce. My wife contacted an attorney during our therapy phase (I did not know this) and wants a divorce. At this point so do I.
I can't see how to keep trying when she doesn't want me to. I can see how divorce will be gut wrenching. I plan to continue to see my therapist and rally the friends and family for support.