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Whether you guys know it or not, your familiarity with each other has given you the weapon's to bring out the nastiness in each other. When you get into fight mode, do you feel like you guys are working toward a solution, or trying to hurt each other?

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You are totally right. We are never working at a solution. It's become more about winning than anything. My dilemma: even if I want counseling and want to try to make things work, when do you say, "enough is enough?"

I grew up in an abusive home where my parents were always fighting. I used to sleep under my bed every night. . .

I love my children more than anything. When I see how this is hurting them, I feel like the worst thing that I can do is to go back for more.

I got into this marriage because I thought I didn't deserve better. Maybe I didn't, but my kids do. Maybe "breaking the cycle" starts right now. How else can I send a message that this kind of relationship is not OK? I sure wish someone would have sent me that message as a child!

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