Divorce Support Forums: Separated from Ex but w young daughter-Friendship?

Our Legal Separation started 6/12/08 after 5 months of divorce hell arguments and fighting over fair terms of separation. For the last 3 months we have lived apart and split our 2.5 year old daughter's time- I get 6 overnights every 14 days. Yet the whole time I was as courteous and loving as possible, telling Ex I would do everything possible to make our marriage work and love her the way she wanted. Went to deaf ears.

That didn't stop her Express Train to freedom and Independence - never questioning her decision or looking back. Now she just told me she bought a house and is moving out within a week or two.

As soon as the separation was signed (and after putting me through hell), she tells me I need to be friendly to her for our daughter's sake.

I lost it - finally the anger that I supressed over the last 5 months came out. I screamed at Ex she has no right to tell me what to do or control our daughter anymore. She is one being selfish and considering her own wants. (She said the marriage ended after our daughter arrived, saying I stopped showing her love - when in fact we both focused on our daughter at the expense of each other). Marriage shouldn't end because of that !!!

How could I be friends after what she did to me and our daughter ? Ex is the one destroying our daughter's future.

If I allow myself to be friends/friendly with Ex then she can walk away from this guilt free and get everything she wants. But I also do not want to be enemies for our daughter's sake. I love my wife and I want to win her back over the next 12 months. I also want to do the best thing for my 2.5 year old daughter. Yet I just told Ex that we cannot be friends after what she did to me - I need time to heal.

What approach do I take to win back my wife ? Should I express my anger now, or do the NC route for a while (except over our daughter) and pretend to be strong and independent ? Or be friends and hope over time she realizes that we should try to work things out.

I know I am in the denial phase - but please allow me that for now - I want to keep the hope for now that things will work out.

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