I've been divorced for 4 years and have an 8 yr old daughter. Just when I think my ex and I can have a civil relationship, he blows. Latest example is summer daycare. Since January, I've been trying to discuss it with him - there's a great summer camp that I want to send my daughter to, it's convenient for both and 1/2 of her class is in it so she'll have friends. We have joint legal, so we technically have to agree on things like that. When I gave him the bill for the camp, he starts telling me that he never agreed to it. He's known about this since January and has never voiced an objection, nor did he offer any other type of summer care options. He just sits back and expect me to do everything, then thinks he can veto whatever he wants. When he told me that he didn't agree to this, I asked him what he wants to do for daycare - he just smiled and said he doesn't have to find anything, he just has to agree with what I find. He actually said that if I want payment for daycare (65%, which is a lot), then I can take him to court - this way I have to pay money out of my pocket also for attorney fees (his exact words)!
Another example is he signed up our daughter for soccer, without checking with me. I bought her all the equipment, which ran over $50, then he told me to make a check out to the soccer league for another $50 so she could play. Our decree doesn't specifically mention who pays what for sports, etc (I need to clarify this with my attorney since it will just get more expensive). I told him he could pay for the league fee as I bought the equipment. He refused, and then in front of the soccer coach (who is a presonal friend of his), he said to me "When are you going to give the payment". I just walked away. He then proceed to tell the coach loudly so I could hear that he would give him a check for the fee since his daughter's mother refused to pay for her, making me sound like the horrible person - other parents were around and I was mortified. He intentionally set me up so he would look like the good guy. Technically, he should be paying for 65% of this. This is the same man that said two months ago that he wanted me to sign off of his parental rights so he could just go "live his life" and not have to deal with child support (also said this in front of our daughter, who I then took to counseling - another battle I had to fight with him). I took him back to court last summer for more child support - my original child support was based on an imputed income of $30k, yet since then he has made over 100k. I won and he's very bitter.
I know this is long but it's so frustrating - I knew when I won the child support increase that he would use every little chance he could to lash out at me so this shouldn't be a surprise. I've come to the realiziation that he will never give me respect or acknowledgement - giving in on an issue or threat from him will only delay the inevitable blow up that will come when I don't give in on something. It took 4 years to realize this, which is a lot of verbal abuse that I've had to deal with.
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Does it ever get easier? (venting)
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