A good friend of mine has been doing it for 5 years since the girls were 9 & 11. The kids love it. Jungle themed room in Dad's house, princess in Mom's. Dad's heritage and huge family connections celebrated at Dad's, Mom's social butterfly ways and connectiosn with the community spending time at Moms.
They've tried from time to time to say that Mom is nicer than Dad or more strict. That Dad is more fun or angrier... and they use these things to try to manipulate the time they spend with either. But the parents have not allowed the kids to dictate where they go at any given time, so the kids never learned to expect it. And there's not a lot of trying to manipulate stuff because the parents don't respond to it. Tehre's some of it, becasue at first it was clear to the girls that if they trashed their Dad in front of Mom, it made Mom happy to hear, and visa versa... but over time and with a LOT of work, the parents have stopped that junk. They've got a wider network of friends probably than if they had just one house, and it's frustrating when a friend next door to Dad's house is going to be left behind so they can spend the week at Mom's... but when they get to Mom's there's the friend who lives next door to Mom's... so all is well.
The older they get, the more important thier friends and schools are, so if you and your ex live close enough and transport the kids to where the friends are, transport the friends to your houses... and let the kids drive when they're old enough... it should be OK. It's only worked for my friend and her kids becasue they have kept the kids in the same school even though Dad moved away frmo the district. He has had to figure out how to drive them to & from school every day on his week, but that's his problem, not the girls', not the ex wife's, and he handles it.
These are some of the most emotionally healthy children of divorce I've ever met!
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Re: Has anyone been doing 50/50 for a long time? rop
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