Divorce Support Forums: My first post..so confused

I too am so sorry that you are going through this. I read your post and it reminded me of the same things that I went through, and am still going through. My stbx and I have a 5 year old and 3 year old together, and he ended up telling me 7 weeks ago that he wanted a divorce because he didn't love me anymore and because he was seeing someone else. So even though he was walking out on our family and cheated on me, I still loved him and wanted him back so badly. I felt like I wouldn't be able to get through it, and that I couldn't survive without him. But, in time, I started to realize that I really could live without him, and that I didn't need to be with a cheater. He didn't respect me at all, or our kids, so why should I want him back. But I wanted him because our marriage meant something to me, but obviously it didn't to him. And even though I still have rough days, and I mean rough, I still am getting better everyday. And I continue to question why I am doing so well after only 7 weeks, but I guess I am just progressing through the grieving process. So I really don't have any advice for you, other than it will get better, it really will. I was sitting here 7 weeks ago having people tell me the same thing, and I thought "yah right", but now here I am telling you the same thing, because it's true. Allow yourself to feel the way you are feeling though, allow yourself to cry, because that is the only way you are going to move forward. I agree that you do need to let it go at some point, but at the same time, it's not always that easy. It's hard to "let go" of a marriage and a spouse that cheats. So just remember that soon enough you will get to that point where you will be able to let it go and move on. But for the time being, let yourself grieve. Hang in there though, a lot of people on here, including me, can relate. Write whenever you need too, even if it's just to vent!

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Andrea

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