Divorce Support Forums: How long can this go on???

Rev, I have been where you are and live it everyday. I got past giving up after about a year or so while going through the process you find yourself in. I love my ex wife( not sayin you do) and she hates me. Her hatred lasts a lifetime, I've seen it before in action. So, I'm faced with loving someone who hates me for the rest of my life. I cna't allow myself to give up, I can't allow my rage to surface. It is a rage that could burn a thousand cities destroying everything and anything in it's path. I know I would feel better to release it and be done with it but what would come after keeps me in check. I had a shrink ask me if I'd like to take it out on the other man, so I could understand that controlling it is the only way to silence the rage that wants to destroy the lives that took the light from my eyes and made me pray to never wake again. Rev at our lowest point such as you find yourself in……… this is when we choose which way to go. Where we belong, who we matter to and who we must survive for. I am divorced, I have survived and kept the rage in check but it didn’t just magically go away. It remains and I have to force myself to deal with it daily. Find your strength to control your feelings of giving up and never waking again, cause there are more emotions and actions you will need to control even when the divorce is done. Your survival instincts will kick in again and these thoughts of giving up WILL pass. Be ready for the emotions that come next. Learn from this time, a time of finding the inner strength to carry on. It WILL be the tool that keeps the later emotions that are directed at hurting others, not fearing the consequences for the guilty or innocent effected by them in check.

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