I truly know what you are saying and I guess yes I do try to make up for things I feel my mother shouldve done or should be doing.My mother hates kids and she would never fight for one.The thing is not only has my son let me be this involved but so has the STBX.And my biggest fear is that if I dont comply then I will be kept from seeing the kids all together.That is the fear that I have lived with for 7yrs and more so in the past three.As for my son I can only say that we almost lost him in a car accident and maybe I do feel a stronger need to baby him.I have a lot to learn from this too I DO realize that. As for who approached the mother about vacation,I did.My son had ask her after I diD and she said she had to think about it,but he made an arguement about it.Her reply to me was that she didnt want the kids to be pissed off at her if she said no.We are all really looking foward to the trip.Thank you