Divorce Support Forums: handling a child that is torn between 2 homes

i know i didn't mention it but the twins are the last for her dad. the twins give him four kids my daughter is in the middle. plus she has a younger sister through me so all together she has 3 sisters and 1 brother. but anyway back to the topic. i am sure when i talk to her dad on the phone i have showed some emotion to the situiation and not realized it. thanks for making me look at the point. as far has her step mom i have tried to get along with and be freinds ( i guess you could say) for my daughter but she doesn't want to make an effort to. and there has been something new come up as of last night my daughter informed me that there was a conversation held she said she doesn't know the whole thing but she does know that my name was mentioned and that the word slut was used and i tried to explain to her in a calm manner that they have the right to feel the way they want tords me. how do i approach that when i promised her i would say anything (and she made me promise). when i listen to her talk about things like that and she makes me promise and i do cause i want her trust so she will come to me b/c if not she will shut off from again. i mean how do i handle that or should i do? it's so good to find someone i can talk to about this stuff i just want to thank you for taking the time to talk to me about this!

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