Wow, there is a lot going on in your marriage- i too was Catholic for many years- there is a lot of "guilt" put upon ones self being raised Catholic- I also struggle with depression, but have mine under control with medication, Both of my parents have passed too- kind of odd- the similarities uh? Did you say how long you've been married? I no longer practice Catholisism; instead go to a Christain church where I continue to be challeneged in my faith walk. Challenged in a good way- to grow closer to God. I did love being married to my husband (before the affair)- he isn't the same man I knew. Although, I have to admit, there were times in the marriage when I wished it was different somehow- We didn't share a lot of common interests, and so I did a lot of things on my own- But still, I loved him deeply,(and still do- which is really hard)...but overall, yes, i thought I was happily married. You're from New York? What is the time difference from Indiana?