Keeping Secrets With Your Child?

It is best for your child that you do not have secrets. You and your child should not have any secrets that are not to be told to the other parent. Having secrets can put your child in a very non-relaxing and vulnerable position. Many children that carry these types of secrets fear the day that they may be asked a compromising question. Having secrets with your child can cause sever anxiety, especially when both you and the other parent are in his or her presence.

If your child is questioned regarding a secret, he or she will realize fast that it is a no win situation. There are two choices for your child, be dishonest to the other parent or reveal the secretive information. Either you or the other parent will be betrayed and this is difficult when your child probably loves you both very much. It is these types of no win situations that you want to prevent your child from ever being a part of.

Secrets do not necessarily have to be declared a “secret” to carry the same harmful characteristics. For example: a father says to his child, “I am going to be finding out on Monday if I am being laid off of my job, but do not tell your mother”. As soon as the child is unable to tell his or her mother, it becomes a secret.

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