Archive for the 'Domestic Violence' Category

A Person to Avoid

Thursday, November 18th, 2010

The literature of divorce and family law includes a character called the Batterer. Sometimes unsuspecting woman marry him without a clue just how miserable he can make life.

The Batterer is the man who, though he can be extremely charming and seductive early in the relationship, later becomes angry and possessive and, worse, abusive later in the relationship.

Psychologists say that very often the Batterer fits a profile: abused as a child or a witness to child abuse, he lacks communications skills, frequently denies his own actions, and refuses to take responsibility for them. He blames others, very often his partner, but becomes very easily threatened by the possibility of her departure. The Batterer is jealous, possessive and controlling, and he becomes violent when he does not get his way. Sometimes the Batterer’s partner becomes a victim of a cycle of violence: smaller acts of abusive behavior – verbal and punching and pinching – become more and more frequent and culminate in a violent loss of control – “a good beating,” after which the Batterer is filled with apparent remorse and promises “to be better.”

In 95 percent of domestic violence situations, the man attacks the woman, and in most all of these situations, the man is a Batterer.

Police dread the Batterer because when they have to intervene in a domestic dispute, very often he will be there.

A woman married to a Batterer is married to a dangerous man.

Domestic Violence May be a Consideration in Property Division in Divorce

Friday, November 13th, 2009

In 1994, Congress enacted the Violence Against Woman Act “…to treat violence against women as a major law enforcement priority, to take aim at the attitudes that nurture violence against women, and provide help survivors need.”

For family law practitioners, domestic violence, particularly spousal and child abuse, remains an important consideration in custody/visitation, mediation and property division.

In some states, domestic violence is a specifically enumerated factor in the division of marital property. In these jurisdictions, spousal abuse by itself is a relevant factor, and the courts consider that the abuse need not be egregious. The courts assume that the abuse is the cause of the marital breakdown. Other states consider spousal abuse economic misconduct because it results in increased medical bills and diminished employment opportunities. In some states, fault — even the abuse of a spouse — may not be considered at all.

The Uniform Marriage and Divorce Act requires that assets be divided without regard to fault or marital misconduct, but even in UMDA states, economic misconduct is a permitted consideration in the division of property, thus opening the door to consideration that domestic violence has an economic impact.

When domestic violence is a consideration in the distribution of property, the most common result is that the wife, who in the abused spouse in 95 percent or more of the cases, receives a larger share of the marital estate than she would normally receive.

Caught in the Trap

Wednesday, January 7th, 2009

Domestic Violence is not something to be taken lightly. If you believe you are a “victim” of domestic violence you must seek help. Trained professionals can only help if you are willing to let them.

There is no reason to feel ashamed. Even the best suffer from domestic violence. There are countless Hollywood stars crying domestic violence and getting a great deal of publicity for it. You do not want to be like the “stars” but if you believe you are a victim, then seek help, immediately.

There is nothing you did to deserve the violence being inflicted upon you. You did not say anything wrong or look at another person, domestic violence has less to do with the person that is on the receiving end of the violence. Domestic violence has everything to do with the person inflicting the hurt on another.

Each state has laws regarding domestic violence. There are shelters and women’s centers that offer help. There are many resources out there for those who are in the midst of a domestic storm.