According to statistics, some 80% of divorcees marry again; however, the numbers for divorces from the second and, even third, marriage get worse and worse. Very often when a marriage flounders, one or both partners blame the other. “Because, they do not see themselves as responsible for the previous marriage ending. Generally, they are more likely to believe their partner’s behaviors caused the divorce, and minimize the influence of their own actions.”
People who can accept their part of the responsibility for the marital failure of the first marriage have a better chance making the second marriage work. Before a second trip to the altar, a person should take a look – a hard look — at his or her behavior in the last marriage. It doesn’t matter what the former spouse did; no doubt he or she played a part. By facing the faults of the face in the mirror, however, a person who can do this can be a part of the group whose remarriage is successful.
Some of the faults may have been a reaction to a spouse’s personality; some faults are going to stress a marriage no matter what the other person’s personality might be.
Many people believe that divorce is too easy and the ease of divorce reflects “a disposable culture where everything from water bottles to cars gets thrown away.” The culture of extreme individualism encourages the cult of self. “Individualists promote the exercise of one’s goals and desires and so value independence and self-reliance while opposing most external interference upon one’s own interests, whether by society, family or any other group or institution, according to the dictionary. ” Individualism says “It’s all about me”; a successful marriage says “It’s all about us.”